Hii! Today is November 29th, 2023. Last night I had an interesting interaction with a certain person. Made me think of a lot of different things. Like how strange it is that almost 5 months ago we had just met and now we are starting to become strangers again. Many songs that I have been listening to lately talk about this topic. The topic of becoming strangers with someone who was once the closest person you had. I'm talking about all kinds of people. A best friend, a boyfriend, a girlfriend, a family member. To me it is so weird that a small interaction can turn into something beautiful then something horrible. It can be like planting a flower. It all starts with one tiny seed planted in a fresh garden. Through time the seed gets watered. Obviously the flower starts to grow, grow, and grow. Its stem starts to come out. The colors start to become visible. Until... someone picks the flower. A couple days pass by and the flower sadly dies. It's like what was the point of growing the flower if it was just going to get picked? Why did we create all those memories and get so close to just end it all in less than 5 minutes? To me it is still a mystery.
But that isn't the point of this, the point is after it ends it's like there is still a piece of them that you find comfort in. They do something and for a moment you just forget about all of the bad things that have happened between you guys. For me it's that person, even after we ended things, they mentioned something about my website. For a moment I thought about how I would always tell them about wanting to make something like this and now that I am they comment on it. I don't know why but I felt comfortable, even if I know we aren't supposed to talk or feel close. Does that happen to you guys too? I really don't know how to explain this feeling. But I know it is there. I think it's maybe because a part of me isn't ready to let go of them. I am so used to having them in my life that letting go is scary. So it's more comfortable having them there...even when things are falling apart. Does that make sense?
If you feel the same way just know it is probably normal and we just have to get through this and soon enough we will learn to be ok without that person. Things just take time. Ugh I started this article at 10am and now it's 10:27pm because I was so busy the whole day and now everything that I had in my mind is fuzzy. But I think I somewhat got my point across. Ok these past few blog posts have been about my thoughts maybe tomorrow I'll write something new! I think it's cause I've had a lot on my mind. I hope you all have a good day tomorrow 'cause I know half of you are probably asleep now :)
Bye Bye
XoXo, Maria E.V
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